The Road Ahead

By Brooke Momblow

“Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life.” Psalm 143:8 NIV

My Lord God,

I have no idea where I am going.

I do not see the road ahead of me.

I cannot know for certain where it will end.

Nor do I really know myself,

and the fact that I think I am following your will

does not mean that I am actually doing so.

But I believe that the desire to please you

does in fact please you.

And I hope I have that desire in all that I am doing.

I hope that I will never do anything apart from

that desire.

And I know that if I do this you will lead me by the right road,

though I may know nothing about it.

Therefore will I trust you always though

I may seem to be lost and in the shadow of death.

I will not fear, for you are ever with me,

and you will never leave me to face my perils alone.

– Thomas Merton –

These days, I’ve felt as though I don’t know where I’m going. I’ve wondered what everything the Lord has been teaching me leads to. I’m struggling with grief for many things: losses physically, losses relationally, heartbreak in society. I don’t recognize myself or the thoughts I think. Politically I’m different than I was. My grief isn’t wrong and God comforts me, but I find myself wondering if I had God’s perspective would I grieve these things in this way?

I want to consider God in all of my thoughts. I wonder in prayer if my new ideas about politics are how I should apply God’s word when I vote or if I’ve totally gone off the reservation?

I want to consider God in all my ways. I think I am following God’s will for me on a daily basis, but in prayer I ask God to help me know His will because I’m not sure I do.

Above all else my desire is to show Jesus how much I love him by walking in obedience. Many days I allow that desire to get buried in the activities of life and find at the end of the day I haven’t acted on it.

This last month I took a break from personal study. Most of my prayers were short and sporadic while walking in the splendor of the outdoors. They went something like this: “Hello, God.” “Good morning.” “Wow, this is amazing. You are amazing.” “Thank you.” With such wordless prayers I spent more time appreciating the Awesomeness of God and the knowledge of His presence all around me wherever I was. That was revelation enough. I considered ways to return simply to enjoying my first love, Christ, and being present to Him.

Because He loves me, I can trust Him. This gives me such peace in my spirit and strengthens my endurance in the hard places. Though I may not know the road ahead, I will follow Him. He is a communicative God so I will seek Him.

“God made the world that he might communicate and the creature receive his glory; that it might be received both by the mind and the heart.” Jonathan Edwards

“The great goal of all Edwards’ work was the glory of God. And the greatest thing I have ever learned from Edwards… is that God is glorified most not merely by being known, nor by merely being dutifully obeyed, but by being enjoyed in the knowing and the obeying.” John Piper

“Each morning let me learn more about your love because I trust you. I come to you in prayer, asking for your guidance.” Psalm 143:8 CEV